I came across this article from vogue, and the letter sent by Looking For A Partner completely summarizes my life. At this point of my life, I feel that everything is perfect. I have a supportive and amazing circle of friends. Recently graduated from my masters. My parents worked hard and gave me comfortable life where I can freely travel and fulfill my hobbies. I run the lucrative family business and finances are quite stable. Definitely, I have more than enough and I am humbled having them. However, one thing is certainly missing and that is “the boyfriend”.

While I dated few men but I never really had a real partner nor been in love. There were also guys who wanted to score or at least try to strike a conversation but the problem lies with me. I blatantly felt some are plainly undateable but every single time I am pursued, there is an inconceivable sentiment that hinders me from getting in a relationship. It’s not that I have this lengthy list of standards but I sense something is wrong. It is indescribable untangled fuzz deep in my heart.

Without speaking like it’s been already done but my gut feeling tells me that the world could offer more far greater than being in a relationship at the moment. Though I don’t reject the want of having a lifetime partner and I won’t deny that I loved the roller coaster excursion of dating. It is a blissful feeling. However, traveling and freedom gave me a wider perspective of the world and there could be infinite opportunities other than dealing with where would be the destination or what food to eat on the next date. Consequently, as an INTJ personality, the fluctuation of feelings easily exhausts me yet I also do not want someone safe and refuse the thrill. Thus, it leads me focusing the youthful energy to myself instead of misspending it.

At 26, prejudices for single and no-boyfriend-since-birth ladies are like embroidered “A” in Scarlet Letter. Shameful but a number take pride in it and I am one of them. A lot of adults misunderstand because it is a norm for someone at this age to be married while others think you’re a crazy egocentric woman who only has self-love. But what I truly believe is that self-development and strengthening one’s spirit can lead you to one man that all your heart yearned for. And all the uncertainties will vanish into thin air when I meet that person and I can finally say, “I have it all, and I have a boyfriend.”

P.S. from the vogue author:

“Deepen your intellect; challenge your imagination. Travel; have sex with strange hot men; become a better friend, daughter, employee; become the kind of rad, trustworthy, beautiful person who you would want to meet and fall in love with.”

P.S. in P.S.:

I will never have sex with anyone. hahaha


2 Replies to “Spark”

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